Believe Not the MakeBelieve
by Cantrelle
Summary: CHAPTER FOUR FINALLY UP! AU. EdwardBella. Edward cleared his throat. "My girlfriend, Bella Swan," he announced. Bella choked on her food. This was the joke of the millennium! They didn't even know each other!
1. The Need for a Girlfriend

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

**Believe Not the Make-Believe**_  
Cantrelle_

"My girlfriend, Bella Swan," Edward announced.  
Bella choked on her food. This was the joke of the millennium! They didn't even know each other!

* * *

**Chapter One**

**The Need for a Girlfriend**

It was one of those days when Edward Cullen actually hated his seemingly perfect life.

Emmett Cullen was practically rolling on the floor, laughing his arse off as he watched the pile of pink, scented envelopes come clattering down from Edward's locker. "Batshit fan girls strike again!" he choked out, unable to stop laughing like he had gone mad. Several pairs of eyes immediately turned to him in curiosity, but he simply didn't care. He was too busy laughing at his brother's dilemma to bother with them.

"I'm warning you, Emmett," Edward said, throwing his brother a glare before he giving a helpless stare at the pink heap on the floor. "What the hell am I going to do with this?" He glanced at his locker; there were still about a hundred pink – and for the life of him, _fuchsia!_ - envelopes in there.

_Ah, shit._

A lot of people might think that someone like Edward would not have the time to actually curse his life. After all, he had everything perfect.

Edward and his family had just been in the neighborhood for no more than five months, but the young man had already gained quite a reputation both in and out of his school. He was quite the charmer, although without trying. With his good looks, agreeable personality, and remarkable intelligence, he was every girl's dreams come true. The epitome of the modern Prince Charming, which always made melodramatic girls go _'aww!' _or faint, or if they maybe even, _"Fuck! Now that's a real man!"_

People liked Edward, were drawn to him somehow. He didn't have to ask anything as a favor, because most were willing to do a lot for him without a fee. (Maybe a date, but that didn't really count.)

'Told you he was perfect.

Unfortunately for him, he was living in the real world, not in some La La Land where he could get everything without anything in return. In the real world, everything had a price. For him, the price was his _legions of batshit fan girls_ – just like Emmett always called it.

His fan girls, who were quite normal as long as it didn't concern him, were either _obsessed_ with him and hounded him every chance they had, or simply worshipped him. They were very scary, especially when they followed him around like some creepy stalker. There was nothing romantic in this (although for most of them it was quite so), because he couldn't live a normal life like he wanted.

He liked them; their loyalty to him alone was worth appreciating. They were sweet, too, sending him gifts which he would always politely turn down because he didn't want to seem like an opportunist.

But the ritual of receiving their love letters every single day of his life grew boring. The ritual of receiving calls at night from girls in school that he didn't even know of was exhausting. The ritual of having to put up with their high-pitched giggles and squeals were annoying too.

He couldn't move without them watching, and it was not as if they _only_ watched – they also interrupted.

One time they even scared away the _guy_ who was just his partner in some project! For Pete's sake, it was a _guy_!

In short they did everything but literally put fences around him.

It was making him really sick now. He was tired of being chased around. This was too much even for him: He, the perfect Edward Cullen. He was seventeen, and he had a lot to do and a lot to learn. He had no plans of wasting his life on fan girls.

"Nice going, Edward," a deep, mocking voice said, snapping Edward back to reality.

Edward turned and forced a smile when he saw who it was. If there was anyone who rivaled his popularity, it would be him – Demetrius Maximillian Cavendish.

The seventeen-year-old Demetrius Maximillian Cavendish was one of the most popular students in their high school, an established name in the campus even before Edward moved to the town. The young man was tall, good-looking, and wealthy; he was both street-smart and book-smart. His hair was black, and naturally unruly; his long bangs falling over his face as if to accent his pale features. He had the bluest pair of eyes, and the glasses he wore did nothing to obscure the intensity in them. He was not unapproachable, but he seemed distant and cold; and there was a certain conceit in the way that he carried himself. He could be kind or cruel, depending on the situation, and most people feared and respected him for it.

While Edward's fan girls adored him for his kindness, Demetrius' own multitude of fan girls – who formed their own group long before Edward's could - liked him for his aloofness and mysteriousness.

When Edward first met him, Demetrius had rudely sized up the former. It was established, at that very moment, that Demetrius didn't like Edward. The feeling was mutual, so the two simply avoided each other whenever they could.

These past few days, though, Edward had been continuously getting more and more popular in the school. Demetrius did not explicitly express his distaste for it, but it was evident in how he spoke. In fact, he hadn't missed a chance to taunt Edward about the matter, whenever they saw each other.

"_He loves attention and doesn't want sharing it with anyone," _Alice had pointed out when Edward voiced out how insufferable Demetrius behaved around him.

Edward didn't really mind so much who was more popular between them. He was too preoccupied by his own problems and academics to pay attention to Demetrius. He didn't see the point of the whole popularity idea. He had friends, and they were enough for him.

"Reading all of them, Cullen?" Demetrius asked, his voice as cold and as bored as it had always been.

Edward flashed a small smile, feeling the stares upon the two of them in the hallway. "It's quite difficult," he said, rather evasive. He tried reading them once. Suffice to say he didn't enjoy the repetition in the messages (if misspellings and chatspeak could be called messages at all) and the various scents numbed his sense of smell for about a week. He decided he'd just pack them in a bag and sold them to a junk shop that bought papers. He knew that his fan girls didn't really expect a reply from him anyway.

Demetrius smirked. "Oh," he simply said, and walked to the locker a few feet away from Edward's. Fates' cruel joke: Their lockers were pretty close to each other.

Edward sighed, not in the mood for Demetrius' wordplay. He kicked the rolling Emmett playfully, muttering for his brother to stand up and stop laughing. Afterwards he picked up the bunchload of scented envelopes and stashed them into his locker carefully. He didn't want to break any girl's heart, was all.

Demetrius pulled open his locker door. Sure enough, masses of pink, scented envelopes tumbled from there, too, and he shook his head. "Another pile," he muttered, glancing at the letters with what seemed to Edward like a mixture of pride and… distaste?

_Strange._

"Wrong locker," Emmett said, and bellowed with laughter when he saw the irritation in Demetrius' face. "I gotta go, Edward. Rosalie's waiting for me," he said, and flashed a sneer at Demetrius before making his way downstairs.

Edward shook his head, used to Emmett. His brother didn't like Demetrius either, and he couldn't blame him.

"I don't like your brother," Demetrius commented, picking up the envelopes like Edward did.

Edward shrugged, now forcing his locker shut. "He doesn't like you either," he said bluntly, and had the satisfaction of seeing Demetrius narrow his eyes at this remark. The whole school heard the Edward's words, and Edward didn't think Demetrius liked to be answered like that – especially not by Edward Cullen, whom he seemed to consider to be his archrival from the very beginning.

Still, he kept his cool. He was Demetrius Cavendish, and people were watching. "Fair enough," he said, a cold, dead smirk on his lips.

Edward sighed, confused by the young man before him. Ah, well, he couldn't claim to know Demetrius to begin with. "I'll just see you around then."

**x~x~x**

"What is _that_?" Alice asked as soon as Edward entered the door to their house. She was clad in a blue dress, like she was going to a party.

_Then again, _Edward thought, _she always looks like she's going to a party. _"Letters." He dragged the black garbage bag behind him, his shoulders slumped.

Alice frowned. "I'm going to do the dirty work again?" she asked, pouting. She was actually the one person who helped him take care of all the letters.

She jumped down from her seat and walked up to him, her eyes not leaving the big bag. "I should tell you, a group of your fan girls cornered me this morning so I could give their letters to you," she said, and pointed to one corner of the foyer. "Kind of personal touch, as they say."

He couldn't help but groan at the sight of more letters. "Alice…"

She raised both hands, shaking her head. "Not my fault. If I didn't accept them, they promised they would make sure to ruin my pretty Porsche. Answer is: _No way_. I'm not sacrificing my car for you, brother dear," she said, a small smirk playing on her lips.

He let out a frustrated sigh. "All right, all right," he said, dragging the garbage bag behind him. "I know you love your car more than anything else." Alice would probably _kill _ for her car, which was kind of scary, for most part.

"I love Mom and Dad and Emmett more," Alice replied, and grinned. "And Jasper, of course," she added, beaming at the mention of her boyfriend from school.

"At least I have my fan girls to love me," Edward cracked, trying to lighten up the situation.

"Brother, that's not love; that's _obsession_," Alice said, and leaned against the wall as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Edward turned to look at her, knowing that specific stance and tone very well. There was something playing in Alice's mind right now, and he was intrigued. She was the most brilliant schemer he had ever met in his life. "All right, let's hear what you have in mind, sister dear."

"Since I don't really like my Porsche threatened because of some girls' whim," she said, lowering her voice for that mysterious factor that she loved playing on him, "I thought I'd tell you the simplest, easiest way to get rid of your fan girls."

Edward cocked an eyebrow, definitely hanging onto her next few words. "How?"

She pushed herself away from the wall, looking very smug. "How does getting a girlfriend sound to you?"

_to be continued._

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It's an alternate universe, so I made Edward's personality lighter and more approachable. I think he won't be so serious if he doesn't have something to angst about anyway. Everyone is human, and Forks is a normal place in a normal neighborhood. Only Emmett and Alice are Edward's siblings.

Demetrius Maximillian Cavendish is my original character; just someone to play against Edward.

Leave a review. :)


	2. The List of Girlfriend Possibilities

It takes me a ridiculously long time, but I update. :)

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**Chapter Two**

**The Classified List of Girlfriend Possibilities**

All Isabella Swan wanted was to be invisible.

The brown-haired seventeen-year-old took a seat behind the desk farthest back, immediately pulling out her music player to keep herself busy. It was still fifteen minutes before the start of class, and most of her classmates were still just piling in. Most of the students in the room was preoccupied by talking to their friends, or cramming their homework, but as per usual Bella was not one of them.

She was not the type to cram, and quite unfortunately, there weren't exactly many people who wanted to talk to her.

She heaved a sigh, plugging the earphones into her ears as she leaned over to her desk and pretended to catch up on sleep. She had spent most of yesterday figuring out said homework, and although she had finished it more easily than she thought she would, the whole thing left her more depressed than anything, wondering if perhaps there was something wrong with her and the speed of how she always finished her schoolwork with.

She crossed her arms over the desk, burying her head in them as the details of her seventeen years played in her mind.

She was only six when she first showed sign of genius, asking things six-year-olds weren't supposed to be able to ask, or reading materials that were beyond children her age. Recognizing her smarts, her teacher had taken the initiative to place Bella in honors class, where she shone even brighter and continued honing the aptitude she was gifted with.

She hadn't started out to be the best, but it wasn't before long that she started topping her class and besting practically anything that school dished out. While everyone thought highly of her, she never really got around to impressing herself, and hadn't thought any of what she had accomplished. She was just Bella, and she was just doing what students were supposed to do.

She was eleven years old when she realized that her accomplishments were starting to drive people away from her. She didn't know when it happened, or how it even happened in the first place, but everyone started looking at her differently – and a _bad _ differently at that. Most of her classmates wouldn't even talk to her unless it concerned something about homework that they didn't understand, and even _that_ grew old too fast: There came a point in time when she had to start the conversation or else no one would talk to her. It wasn't that they didn't notice her or her existence, because everyone was aware of her all too well – it was just that they didn't want to even look at her.

It was at this moment that the bell rang, signaling the start of their class. Bella groaned, pulling herself up from her slouch as she regarded her classmates with what she could only describe to be indifference. When Charlie, her father, had stipulated that she spend high school in the small town where he lived, Bella had been more than glad to come. She never told her mother, Renee, but the big city was choking her, and she knew when it was time to scram.

She had hoped everything would be different in Forks; she was thinking she'd make at least a few friends after almost two months of being in school. So far that wasn't happening, and all she had accomplished was establishing herself to be a wallflower who could always and forever ace schoolwork. Not that she minded entirely; she'd been so used to it that it stopped to matter a long time ago. Halfway through it all, she realized that it was much, much better to be ignored than be paid attention to; and so now she tried her best to blend in with the crowd every chance she got.

"Would anyone want to solve the first equation on the board?" Mr. Robertson asked, his gaze on her. It was only a matter of seconds before everyone followed where he was looking at, and Bella nearly slammed her head on her desk.

This wasn't helping her invisibility project. No, not at all.

**x~x~x**

It was one of those moments in his life when Edward doubted his sister's sanity.

The young man slammed the door of his locker, its sound reverberating throughout the walls of the mostly empty hallway. He stared down at the pile of fan girl letters at his feet, wondering if perhaps he should consider the ridiculous idea Alice had tossed him yesterday afternoon.

"_Are you insane?" he asked, thinking it never hurt to ask. He had a very good reason to be incredulous, and he wasn't about to let Alice get away with an idea so cliché and so ridiculous. He had long accepted that his sister was a natural genius, but this was just... _insane_. He'd never heard of anything as silly as this in his lifetime. Never ever._

_Much to his chagrin, Alice only smiled, a Cheshire smile that seemed to accent the cunning in her eyes. "Perfect sane, dear brother, let me assure you." She plopped down the couch, rolling her eyes the way everyone did when they thought of something. "A girlfriend is what you need."_

_Edward huffed. "Look, Alice. I know you're smart, but don't you remember that the reason we're having this conversation is exactly because I'm _running away_ from girls?"_

_Alice giggled. "Oh, you make it sound so bad, Edward."_

"_It _is_ bad," he insisted. "Actually, worse than bad."_

"_I guess," she agreed, crossing her legs. "Which is why you need a girlfriend, to stop those fan girls from hounding you every chance they get." She raised a forefinger as if to emphasize her point. "You have to realize, Edward: The reason they're so persistent is exactly because you're free, and no one girl has completely staked her claim on you." _

_Edward gaped at his sister, closing his mouth when he realized how his jaw had quite literally dropped upon hearing her explanation. Was he really hearing this from his own sister? What, Alice suddenly had a degree on fangirl psychology?_

"_You might not see it the way girls do, but this fact gives them hope – that maybe, just maybe, they might have a chance with you. After all, what might be the reason you're still single and very much available?"_

_She held up two fingers. "There are two possible reasons. One is that you're clearly not interested in girls at the moment. This, of course, is automatically scrapped off the list, because I doubt those girls even consider the idea. It's ridiculous, and it can't possibly be true." She gestured for him to shush when he started to protest. "Quiet, Edward. Remember: When girls think, it isn't about you; it's about _us_."_

"_That's crazy!" he said. "What's this bias against men when it comes to relationships, anyway?"_

"_Don't talk like that, Edward; you offend Society greatly. Anyway, you can't do anything about it; it's how girls think. Now's not the time to change us, because one, you can't; and two, we won't let you."_

_When he didn't speak, Alice continued. "Anyway, the second possible reason why you're still single is the highly popular and most accepted reason on the face of the planet: You still haven't found _her_, whoever she is, and because of this, your fan girls are grasping on straws in hopes that one of them might be your ultimate her."_

_She raised her chin, looking smug and more confident than ever. "For this reason, Edward, I see that the only way you can get your fan girls to get out of your face is for you to get a girlfriend. I can't assure you that all of them will give up, but trust me, the numbers will fall quite dramatically."_

_For a few moments there was only silence, until finally Alice walked up to him and snapped her fingers in front of his stunned speechless form. "Hey! You all right?"_

"_That's probably the most interesting, most eye-opening stuff I've ever heard in my entire life," he managed to grumble, prompting a playful slap on the back from Alice._

"_See! I told you I'm good at this! Now why I let you in on the list of possible girlfriends I have for you?"_

_His eyes grew wide at this remark, blinking twice in succession. "You're kidding me. You already have a list?"_

_She smirked. "I figured you'd need it someday soon."_

Edward ran a hand over his face, frustration littering his features as he realized what time it already was. Without further ado he turned on his heel in the direction of the lunchroom, inwardly cursing his predicament. Did he really have to go through this so he'd get some peace and quiet?

He still couldn't figure out what must have come over him, but yesterday he had unwittingly agreed to look at Alice's '_classified list of girlfriend possibilities_'. It was too late when he realized what he had just done, and too late to take back his yes from his devious little sister – whom he could swear was too smart for her own good.

"_No fair, Edward!" Alice had shrieked playfully, running off to her room with her stupid list. "A man never turns back on his word! See you in the lunchroom tomorrow and let's get you a girlfriend already!"_

For the umpteenth time that day, Edward Cullen sighed.

_Good Lord, what has become of the world?_

**x~x~x**

Bella sank onto her seat, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone in the lunchroom. It was only until a shadow fell over her form that she looked up, giving a faint, genuine smile when she saw Angela. "Hey," she greeted. Angela was one of the firsts and one of the few nice people she'd ever met since she entered the high school, and the girl seemed sincere enough when she told Bella she'd like to be 'lunchmates'.

"Bad day?" Angela asked, sitting opposite her. She pushed a plate of nachos towards her, taking a bite of one herself.

"How did you know?" Bella asked, wondering how the girl could tell which day was worse than the last. If she was asked, she wouldn't be able to tell the difference of her own frown on a bad day and on a worse day.

"I kinda figured from your slouch," Angela said lightly. "And, I know you hate being called to recite." The two of them were Calculus classmates. "I was already there when Mr. Robertson asked you to answer the first question."

"Oh," she muttered. "It isn't a bad day, but, well, that didn't really help me keep low. I just – "

Whatever else she had to say was interrupted by the loud, embarrassing squealing from the doorway to the lunchroom. Despite herself, Bella raised her head and cocked it to where the noise came from, only to frown when she realized who caused it again.

"Edward Cullen," Angela said easily, an amused smirk on her lips. "Aren't they tired of the same routine every single day of their lives?"

Bella shrugged, going back to her packed lunch. "I guess he keeps them busy. When academics isn't your interest, you have to find something – or in this case, someone – in school to keep you from completely dropping out." It was too late when she realized what she had said, and when she looked at Angela she knew it was too late to take everything back. "I – "

To her surprise, Angela only laughed. "Don't worry about it, Bella; I figured the same thing a long time ago." Her eyes were in Edward's direction when she spoke. "I guess if Edward Cullen can keep most people in school, then I don't mind having to put up with all this… shrieking and fangirling."

Bella nodded. She had talked to Edward Cullen only once before, but she heard only the best about him. Even unintentionally, she had seen for herself how kind and friendly he was, and even she realized that he was more intelligent than he let on. She admitted he was pretty charming and good-looking, too, but that was something she'd rather keep to herself.

Anyway, Edward Cullen was none of her business. The first and last time they spoke to each other was on her first day in the school, and she doubted he even remembered her, given the number of girls who surrounded him everyday of his life.

She stabbed her pork chop with her fork, quirking an eyebrow when she realized that she'd never heard of a girlfriend of his before. Now wasn't that odd, for someone almost worshipped by the female population to not have a girlfriend?

_Either he's not interested, or he's still looking. Bet's on he's still looking, _she thought, and inwardly cringed when she realized that she was probably thinking the same way his fan girls thought of the matter.

As if reading her mind, it was then that silence suddenly ruled over the lunchroom. Bella flinched in surprise, and turned in Cullen's direction to check. Sure enough, the whole commotion – or lack thereof, in this case – was once again caused by him, and this time, with his sister.

The spirited Alice Cullen stood smug and playful beside her brother, who, in Bella's opinion, looked too pale for his own good. _Probably not getting enough sunlight._

"Everyone!" Alice called out cheerfully. "I'm most glad to inform you that my brother has finally found himself a girlfriend!"

_to be continued._

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Angela is the same one in the book, although she'd probably be closer to Bella here. Unless I say otherwise, all characters found in the book play the same role in this story.

I really enjoyed Alice's little speech about fan girl psychology. Heck, I didn't realize that I knew that much about fan girls myself! Ho-ho.

Leave a review. :)


	3. Spinning the Strings of Fate

**Claimer: **Freya Svenningsen is my original character.

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**Chapter Three**

**Spinning the Fate Strings**

"Nice to see you here, Edward."

Edward felt tempted to roll his eyes at his sister, who stood under the shade of a random tree near the lunchroom. The young woman was smiling like she knew all the secrets of the world, although knowing her, that was probably very, _very _ close to the truth. "You told me to go."

"You could have ditched me," she countered. "It means you're really interested, yes?"

He shook his head. "Not really, but I'm interested to see who made it to your _Classified List of Girlfriend Possibilities_. May I?" he asked, holding out a hand for the cursed piece of paper whose content made him lose precious sleep the other night. It was ridiculous, of course, but it still made him curious.

"Nope," Alice said, pulling the list close to her chest. "There's a reason it's called 'classified', brother; you're not allowed to see it unless you agree to follow as I say – which means you'll get a girlfriend, and she has to be one of the girls in this list."

"You're crazy," he muttered, just as the two of them started walking to the building where the bigger cafeteria was. "Why are you doing this again?"

"Partly because I'm concerned for you," she told him, walking a couple of paces ahead, "but more because I love my Porsche. C'mon, Edward; have you forgotten? They're actually threatening my car because of _you_."

He shook his head, quite certain he should be insulted that his own sister compared her to a car. Sure it was a luxury car, but still. Sometimes he wondered how Alice could be so smart and so childish at the same time. "All right, if you're not giving me the list, then at least tell me how you came up with that stupid thing."

"If it's so stupid then why are you so bothered by it?" his sister teased, and it was all he could do to keep himself from literally smacking some sense into her head. He'd have to ask their parents where she got this dangerous cunning, really, because obviously he got cheated on the gene pool. Why couldn't he have gotten as annoying as she was? If that were the case, maybe this little game of theirs wouldn't be as one-sided as this.

"Just tell me, okay?" he muttered, earning a giggle from Alice.

"Fine. I picked the girls who are not interested in you."

The look he had given her must have looked so incredulous that she laughed, loud enough to garner the attention of almost everyone within earshot. "Shh!" he shushed, a mixture of confusion and irritation in his voice. What the hell was so funny, anyway?

"You should have seen the look on your face," she told him. "Why, Edward Cullen? Did you think no one was immune to your effortless charms?"

He elaborately frowned at this. "Of course not," he said, huffing when Alice giggled again. "I mean, there's still Demetrius and his hordes of fan girls and – "

"Oh, did you know that your fan girls are not mutually exclusive?" she interrupted with a nod of her head. "I made a little survey, and apparently most girls can switch sides any day, depending on the context of the situation. Sometimes they prefer you to Demetrius, but sometimes they prefer Demetrius to you."

"Oh really," he said dryly. Like he actually needed to know that. He wasn't the type to dwell on things as superficial as popularity contest. And gracious, what else did Alice do during her spare time, exactly?

"Really," Alice said, apparently missing his uninterested tone. "It was pretty difficult, but I found a number of girls who aren't interested in you – or at least relative to the degree of your fangirl's obsession. I've narrowed down the list, and I'm sure it won't be hard for you to take a pick as to who you'd like to be your girlfriend for the next few months or so."

"You sound so, _so _ sure of this," he said. "You really think I'd agree to this… preposterous idea of yours?"

"Brother, I don't _think _you'll agree to this brilliant idea of mine," Alice remarked, just as the two of them stepped into the lunchroom. "I _know_."

As if in agreement with Alice, it was then that an intimidating horde of fan girls stepped forward and blocked his way, screaming the name he was getting quite sick of. "EDWARD!"

Alice smiled, raising a commanding hand to pacify the girls and keep them from mobbing him; and for the life of him, Edward couldn't begin to fathom how she could pull that off. "I don't know about you, Edward," she said through her smile, "but if I were you, I'd think fast. 'Seems to me like you're the last piece of meat in a pack of hungry wolves, and it's not looking very pretty."

Damn, but Alice knew him so well.

**x~x~x**

Demetrius Cavendish stared at the commotion near the lunchroom entrance with a shake of his head. "How trivial," he remarked, before turning back to his food.

Seated opposite him, muttering something unintelligible, were the popular students. He hadn't realized that they had managed to take a seat beside him before it was too late, and although he didn't really like them, he figured it would be a pain to find another decent place where he was not too conspicuous (a difficult feat, admittedly, and he hated wasted effort). "He's really basking in the glory, isn't he?" they said, all too obvious in their attempts to suck up to him. Not that he minded; he was rather used to them.

"Quite," he said, pretending calm. Damn, but the whole thing bothered him more than he could possibly say, that this Edward nobody-turning-somebody was gaining reputation at a rate that was fast rivaling his own. "But not at all unexpected."

"Not going to do anything about him?"

He chewed on his food slowly, his eyes falling on a nearby table beside his own, occupied by a number of students from his Calculus class. Oddly enough, he felt a little calmer when he saw all of them still buried in the problem set that they had been assigned with; not one even looked up to give a mere glance in Cullen's direction.

"Nope," he said, taking in the mixture of confusion, irritation and frustration in Edward's face when he looked at him again. "He's already digging his own grave by standing stupidly where he is."

He had too much sense to bother with someone like Edward Cullen.

**x~x~x**

"Well?" Alice demanded, glaring at him while she kept her smile intact for his fan girls. She had outstretched one arm, impressively holding off the girls with a mere signal. "Hurry up, Edward-o; it's hard to smile when you don't mean it!"

He shifted his gaze from her and to the rest of the female population standing so very close to him, in some distracted part of his mind wondering how exactly his sister could do so much without trying. "I can't do it!" he said, almost tempted to punch something right then and there. Why was his life so complicated, anyway?

"Of course you can!" Alice interjected. "All you have to say is yes, and I'll tell them that you have a girlfriend." She shook her head confidingly. "Don't worry; I won't give them a name. I'll just tell them you have a girlfriend, so they'll leave us alone. That's fair, you think?"

He only stared at her, wondering how his sister defined _fair _to begin with. "That's crazy," he said, only to flinch back when the girls shrieked his name, much louder this time. "Ow."

"Edward! Did you receive the love letter I sent you?" girls screamed from all around the room, making him shiver despite himself. Goodness, but now that he thought about it, Alice's offer was starting to become more and more appealing.

"No name, Edward!" Alice said impatiently. "Just give me your yes and I'll tell a little white lie for you! Hurry up!"

Edward ran a hand over his face, frustration welling up in his chest. "All right," he said, swearing in his mind as he said the words. He just knew he would regret all of this later. "Tell them about my nameless girlfriend."

Alice cocked her head to one side, her arm dramatically falling to her side as a sly smile fell over her lips. "Good," she said, and suddenly, as if commanded by her, all the lunchroom was quiet and intently listening to what she had to say. "I knew you'd see it my way, brother dear."

Edward could only hope for the best as Alice turned to his fan girls, smiling an innocent smile that hid all her cunning from the world.

"Everyone!" she called out cheerfully. "I'm most glad to inform you that my brother has finally found himself a girlfriend!"

**x~x~x**

Bella could have sworn that the world stopped for a moment right there. The whole lunchroom was suddenly silent, like everyone had lost their ability to speak in that crucial, split second of their lives.

"Edward has a girlfriend?" Angela breathed, her voice sounding loud amidst the eerie silence that had fallen over the room. She looked unshaken, embarrassing Bella with her calm. Damn, but she looked more amused than anything else, and, well, she was definitely not as stunned as Bella was sincerely willing to admit herself to be.

"I… guess," Bella muttered, looking down to her lunch as she did. She was starting to feel stupid; what the hell did she care if Edward had a girlfriend? It wasn't her business to begin with. That, and this was definitely worrying: Could this mean that the fangirl environment was rubbing off on her?

The thought was waaay too scary for her to even acknowledge.

"Not surprising," she added, shrugging casually. Nah, she was probably just scaring herself. She was too smart to actually fall into the trap of being a mindless zombie following a popular guy with the most intense pair of eyes –

_Scary thoughts, Bella. Shut up._

"You're right," Angela agreed, going back to her food with a nod. "After all, he _is_ popular, and quite good-looking."

"Pretty kind, too," Bella added, lifting her head when she received a curious glance from Angela. "Oh, I've spoken to him once, on the first day of school. I was lost, and he walked me to the Administration Building."

Angela parted her lips to speak, only to be cut off by the sudden eruption of questions from the students all over the place.

"Who is she?"

"Why don't we know about this?"

Despite herself, Bella craned her neck to see the spectacle. She was pretty curious about this girlfriend, because frankly she already knew what hell awaited the girl once her name was disclosed. Edward's fan girls were _terrifying_ – in the truest sense of the word – and unless the girlfriend was a very shrewd girl who knew how to get out of trouble _really well, _then Bella could only wish her the best of luck.

Alice only smiled, calming the crowd with a wave of her hand. Bella nodded as if on instinct, realizing that Edward's girlfriend would have to be just like the cunning Alice to handle all of the young man's fan girls without effort. "It's only been a few days since my brother's girlfriend answered his wooing," she said, earning gasps from her audience. "I myself have only known about this today."

"You mean Edward actually _courted _ her?" the girls snapped, sounding dangerously more jealous with every passing second.

Oh, but Bella just knew that Alice was making things much worse for this girlfriend. Inwardly, she wondered at the constipated look on Edward's face, but he probably already realized this, too.

Alice nodded innocently. "Uh-huh. It's only been days since they considered themselves official, and let's just say Edward didn't know how to break this to you." A smile that was almost a smirk twisted the corners of her lips. "I convinced him to tell you about it, at least, so you can step back and give him a little breather from all this... _admiration_. After all, she might get jealous of you and all…"

"So she's from this school?"

"Uh-huh."

"Who is she?" one of the girls demanded. Bella knew her from History class – Freya Svenningsen, the most popular swimmer in their high school. The pretty Freya was a die-hard fan of Edward _and _Demetrius, although rumors all around the school said she and Demetrius were already going out.

_Who said I'm not aware of what's happening? _Bella thought to herself with a smirk. Sometimes it really paid to be alone; she knew so much more than what others gave her credit for, when it came to gossip.

"Excuse me?" Alice said, her smile evidently faltering.

"Who's Edward's girlfriend? You said she's from this school," Freya said, the curls of her long brown hair framing her face perfectly. She smiled, her green eyes lighting up with mischief. "I'm sure everyone of us would like to meet her."

Everyone hollered their agreement.

"Oh, this is bad," Angela said, making Bella turn to her. "With fan girls like that, it's not surprising that Edward didn't want to let anyone know about his girlfriend. Those girls are pretty… scary."

Bella gave a laugh. "That's the grossest understatement I've ever heard so far in my life," she said with a shake of her head.

"It's a wonder, though," Angela continued. "Doesn't it make you think who among the girls in this school has enough self-control to keep Edward's wooing to herself?"

That made Bella pause. Hell, this conversation was turning out to be more interesting than she first thought it would be. "Maybe she's… not like them?" she said, looking pointedly at the horde of girls who looked about ready to lunge at Edward. Poor bastard.

Angela nodded thoughtfully. "That makes sense. Edward doesn't want to tell anyone about her to protect her, sort of." She glanced in Edward's direction. "But now he's just told everyone about her."

"He still hasn't given us a name," Bella said. That still kept Edward's girlfriend safe, at least for the time being. Fan girls had this uncanny ability to know everything about the object of their obsession – err, _fascination_, and even Bella had to give them credit for it.

"Not for long," Angela disagreed, a small frown on her lips.

"I don't think that's necessary," Alice countered, staring frankly at Freya as she cocked her head to one side. "My brother has a girlfriend, and that's all you need to know."

"I think it's only fair to Edward's girlfriend that he introduces her to us," Freya was saying, smiling prettily despite the dangerous tone of her voice. "It'll be easier for them both, so they can already go out in public without worry."

Freya paused. "Or is there something about her that makes you hesitate to introduce her to us?"

Bella saw Alice smirk at this remark, obviously getting irritated by Freya. The brunette's doubt about this supposed girlfriend was all too evident in her speech. Distracted, Bella looked over to Edward, the play of emotions in his face making her feel sorry for him. He probably realized, too, what he had just brought upon himself and his girlfriend, and he was already regretting it – immensely.

She watched him whisper to Alice, looking impatient and frustrated and worried, but Alice only smiled at him as the spoke. After about a minute of a quiet argument with her brother, Alice turned back to the rest of the lunchroom with a grace that was only hers.

"All right," she said, narrowing her eyes smugly. "We'll humor you."

Bella watched as Edward stepped forward from behind his sister, and offered a kind, exhausted smile at the spectators before himself. "I'll introduce my girlfriend to you tomorrow."

"I told you so," Angela said, and Bella shook her head.

She was going to pray for Edward's girlfriend – fervently.

**x~x~x**

"Thanks for the lift," Bella said, clumsily grabbing her books and backpack as soon as the car engine stopped. She glanced up at Charlie's house, noticing that the lights were still off, and decided that her father was still not home. "Much appreciated."

Angela smiled from behind the wheels. "Sure thing, Bella. Thanks for helping me out with the project, too."

"No problem," she said, and threw her bag over her shoulder. "See you tomorrow!" she called out, hopping out of the car. She watched as her friend drove off, turning to the house as soon as the car was out of her sight.

She started to walk, feeling her pockets for her keys –

"Hello, Isabella Swan."

There was a loud _thud!_ when the books hit the cold asphalt, together with the clinking of the keys that she dropped. "What the – ?" she started, swearing her heart must have literally jumped out of her chest in surprise.

"Sorry," the person said quietly. "Did I scare you?"

"Not really, but you made me drop by stuff," Bella snapped, worried for her books first and foremost. These things were most precious to her, and it would be so irritating if they got ruined only because she dropped them stupidly. She reached out for her books, only to pause when she recognized the voice, and looked up from her crouch.

"Hi," Alice Cullen greeted, the smile on her lips illuminated by the faint light of the lamppost nearby. "I'm Alice Cullen and we're classmates in Advance Lit," she said. "Please, call me Alice."

"I – I know you," Bella said, and silently scolded herself for stammering. She picked up her books hastily, and got to her feet so that she was standing taller – although far less graceful – than the pretty brunette. "Call me Bella," she said, wondering what Alice was doing in her house at such an hour. They weren't entirely strangers thanks to Advance Lit, but still. "Uhm, is there anything I can do for you?" she asked, and regretted the words as soon as they escaped her lips.

"Yes, actually there is," Alice said, giving a slow nod. "I have a favor to ask of you, Bella."

_to be continued._

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	4. The Problem with Intermediaries

:D

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**Chapter Four**

**The Problem with Intermediaries**

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," Edward groaned, tempted to just ditch the rest of his classes as he walked with his sister along the hallway. It was the day after he had told everyone of his nonexistent girlfriend, and people had been staring at him weirdly since this morning, like a prelude to the insanity that he had willingly brought upon himself.

Alice giggled. "I _am _ pretty persuasive when I want to be," she said, holding stacks of books against her chest. "Besides, that was Freya Svenningsen yesterday, and it was for the best that you did as I told you to." She seemed proud of herself for this. "You wouldn't have wanted her to find out that you were only telling everyone about a make-believe girlfriend, would you? And at a point so early, too."

Edward groaned again. He actually didn't care who the hell it was, but Alice was right. Freya Svenningsen was Freya Svenningsen, and she was one of the most popular and most influential students in their high school. The point she raised made sense, and he would have been found out if he had chosen to go against what Alice had advised him to say. "Right. Svenningsen," he muttered.

The beautiful brunette was the best swimmer in their school, and many esteemed and envied her for it. She was a self-proclaimed admirer of both himself and Demetrius, although Edward was not oblivious to the rumors that she and Demetrius were already going out.

"She irritated you, didn't she?" he asked his sister, remembering how Alice's perfect calm had faintly cracked under Freya's arrogant tone. Freya had a reputation for being an arrogant, self-centered drama queen who held no regard for those whom she didn't consider to be up to par, and she had no second thoughts about openly questioning Alice's claims in front of almost the entire school.

Alice gave a slight frown, surprising Edward. "She did," she admitted, to which her brother only shook his head.

He hated to admit it, but Freya was good. It was very rare – hell, almost _never _– that anyone could make Alice lose her legendary composure. Such thing simply didn't happen, and most certainly not to Alice, who had everyone wrapped around her little finger.

"Anyway," Edward muttered, deciding he and Alice had had enough chitchat. It was time to talk about business and find out what his crazy little sister had managed to put together for his stupid announcement this afternoon.

"Everything is well and good," Alice said with a nod, flipping through a small notebook with the stack of textbooks that she carried in her arms. "I actually sent a group message to the entire school that you'd make an official announcement in the lunchroom this afternoon."

"_WHAT_?"

Alice grinned. "I jest, brother. Although you might want to check your phone, because the text message about you introducing your mysterious girlfriend to everyone has been circulating since this morning."

Edward could have sworn that he turned just a little paler upon hearing this. "You've got to be kidding me," he choked out, although he could see that Alice was not. He was wordless for a few moments as they walked, trying to figure out the implications of this fiasco.

First of all, text messaging had got to be one of the worst plagues created by mankind. If the messages about his nonexistent girlfriend had been passed around since this morning, then this meant that probably the entire school would be in the lunchroom this afternoon, eager to wait for what he was about to say.

Second, and even more worrying to him was the fact that this would mean he'd be lying to every single person who'd be there. He wasn't a self-righteous bastard, and he knew that he'd lied many times to many people before. But this one was different, because this was pure selfishness at work, and he wasn't too sure if he'd hold the same regard for himself if he'd go through with this.

A lie was still a lie, and the fact that he'd be lying to so many made the mere thought of it all the worse. He swallowed, his uncertainty like heavy chains that was slowly crumbling his composure.

Last, and most certainly not the least: He didn't even have a freaking girlfriend to speak of.

"Alice," he muttered through clenched teeth, just as he caught sight of the lunchroom far ahead. Like he had expected, the place was crammed with students, both male and female, looking as if the entire school had agreed to spend their lunch especially in that place at that exact time. "Do I have a girlfriend to introduce to everybody?"

Alice gave a smile that seemed too cunning for her age. "Of course, Edward," she said, just as the two of them stopped in front of the lunchroom entrance. The place seemed to freeze when it realized their presence, and Edward swallowed. He'd been in the stupid limelight long enough, but he'd never had so many people stare at him at the exact same time.

Frankly, he just wanted to scram and sleep the rest of this nightmare away.

"Relax, brother," Alice whispered, her cold, calculating voice like a reminder that this wasn't a dream. It was a nightmare at its worst, and there was no waking up any time soon.

"Isabella Swan is waiting for you."

**x~x~x**

"Wow that's a lot of books," Angela remarked, throwing an almost incredulous stare at the classic novels that Bella was carrying with her to the lunchroom.

The awkward girl smiled down at her friend as she remained standing beside the table that Angela occupied. "Advance Lit," she muttered, as if that explained everything, and cursed herself when she realized how tense she was. "I – I've been losing track of the readings and all, and the symbolisms are confusing me somewhat."

She fidgeted, hoping her lies were plausible enough for Angela. She'd lied many times before, but she was the worst liar during the times that the need to lie actually arose. It felt even worse that she was lying to her friend, and about something so stupid, too.

"_You can't tell anyone about this," Alice said, pleading and yet without losing the command in her voice. "Please, Bella. I know it's probably too much to be asking you all this, considering we've barely spoken, but I hope you understand. This means a lot to me."_

"Oh," Angela said, nodding understandingly. "So why don't you put those down? They look heavy."

Bella tried to keep her smile from skewing. "Uhm, that's what I wanted to tell you about," she said, fidgeting as she tried to meet Angela's stare. "I – I'm… I won't be having lunch with you today, since I need to read all these, and I felt like maybe eating by myself would be better so I can go through the symbolisms more quickly and – "

Angela laughed, cutting her off. "That's okay, silly, you don't need to explain yourself," she said. "Although maybe reading in the library would be better?"

For a few moments, Bella could only blank out. "_What_?"

"The library," Angela said, stabbing the slice of pineapple on her plate. "Reading in the library would be much better, I think. It's a whole lot quieter there, and much more comfortable, don't you think so?"

Bella stared at Angela. "Oh. Right." She adjusted the books in her arms, and inwardly scolded herself for being such a liar, and being so terrible at it, too. That, and really, what the hell was she doing, following just as Alice Cullen had instructed her to do? It wasn't as if she owed the girl anything. They had never even spoken until last night, and what she was about to do wouldn't yield anything faintly productive or lucrative for her.

Still, it made her pause whenever she remembered the pleading in Alice's eyes. The girl had looked so desperate, so distressed that Bella just _had _ to say yes to what she asked her to do.

"I – I read better and… understand better when I eat while reading," she muttered lamely, the words sounding so awkward and ridiculous even to her own ears that it took all her effort not to squirm. It didn't even make any sense! "But thanks for the suggestion – " she stopped in midsentence, only then realizing that Alice was already waving at her from across the lunchroom, beckoning for her to approach.

"Bella?" Angela said, making the other girl blink.

"Uhm, yes. You know what, I – I really need to go now, Angela," she quickly said, and offered a smile that she hoped passed off as normally clumsy. "See you in class?"

Angela smiled. "Sure thing, Bella," she said, before turning back to her lunch.

Heaving a deep sigh, Bella turned on her heel. She really felt bad about lying to her closest friend in school. She made a mental note to make it up to Angela the next day; probably bring a cake for them to share or something.

She looked ahead and frowned, noting the agitation that seemed to characterize the atmosphere. It took her a moment to remember why – today was a great day, after all.

It was the day that Edward Cullen would introduce his girlfriend to the entire school population.

Shaking her head, she walked briskly to where Alice was, keeping low the entire time. Regardless of whether everyone was busy with Edward's little announcement or not, she still couldn't risk being too conspicuous. Alice was Edward's sister, and that she was with the girl was the last thing she would want people to notice. No, that would not help her invisibility project at all.

Almost surprisingly, she reached Alice without bumping to anyone or causing an accident. She stopped in front of the girl, still clutching on her books tightly as if her life depended on them. "Alice – " she started, only to pause when she realized that Alice's brother was with her. She fidgeted, hoping against hope that everyone's eyes were too fixed on Edward to stray to the walking disaster that she was.

Strangely enough, Edward Cullen himself was staring at her, his eyebrows drawn down in what seemed to be a mixture of wonder and… _gratefulness_?

Bella inwardly frowned, turning away instinctively. The only explanation why Edward would be staring at her like that was probably because Alice already told him about their little agreement last night. It wasn't surprising, really, and it made sense: Alice didn't look like she needed a brother, but she certainly looked very fond of Edward, and the young man definitely seemed like he was always there to help his sister with everything, too. If anything else –

"Bella," Alice greeted warmly, interrupting her musings. The graceful young lady gave her a welcoming hug, effectively making Bella stiffen.

"Uh, hi," she managed to breathe out, gracelessly standing there like an inflexible post. She wanted to return Alice's embrace, but she was still holding her stack of books to her chest, so the whole thing was just impossible and –

_I'm just terrible at this, _she thought to herself, cringing when she realized that Edward was still staring at her, the slight quirk of his eyebrows indicating that he could clearly see her discomfort.

As if realizing her predicament, Alice let go. "I'm so glad you made it," she said, clasping her hands together in delight. "I thought you changed your mind the last minute, and I wouldn't know anyone else to ask my favor. Here," she said, gesturing to the table where she and Edward always had their lunch, and pulled a chair, "why don't you take a seat first?"

Bella stammered, her nerves very, very close to triumphing over her rational thoughts. "Uhm, can't we just get this over with? I mean, I kind of still have something to do afterwards, and, uh – "

"Of course," Alice cut off with a smile. "But before that, I'd like you to meet my brother." She glanced at her brother over her shoulder. "Edward, meet Isabella Swan. She was the girl I was telling you about," she said, before turning back to Bella. "Bella, my brother, Edward Cullen."

Bella stood there uncomfortably as Edward gave her a small smile, taking the initiative to offer his hand when he seemed to notice her unease. "A pleasure to meet you, Isabella – "

"Bella," she interjected, before she could stop herself. She bit her lip when she realized how silly she must have sounded, and attempted to redeemed herself by taking Edward's hand. "I mean, I'd prefer that you call me Bella instead of Isabella – " she added, stopping only when she realized that she was already rambling, all the while conscious of the warmth of Edward's hand around her own. "Uh – "

Much to her surprise, Edward gave a light chuckle. "All right, then. Bella it is," he said.

She flashed him an embarrassed smile. "Uhm – "

"Yes?"

She glanced down to their hands, still intertwined. "My hand," she pointed out, blinking when Edward suddenly let go of it.

"Right! Your hand," he grumbled, giving her a sheepish grin. "Sorry."

At this she stared at him stupidly, wondering at how carefree he was acting. He was certainly not as stuck up as some people portrayed him to be. Talking to him like this so casually now was almost enlightening for her – at least now she knew that there was actually something about him that was even worthy of all the worship that he was receiving –

_Stop it, Bella, _ she thought to herself, knowing she didn't have the right to judge him from what she saw from afar. She was supposed to be better than that.

"I'm so glad that you said yes to Alice," Edward said, looking mildly embarrassed as he looked at her. "At first I couldn't believe that she would actually be able to talk you into this. I – "

"That's enough, Edward," Alice cut off sweetly, holding up a pacifying hand to shut her brother up. "Since Bella was kind enough to help us out, I think it's only right that we let her eat first, right?"

_Help _them_ out? _ Bella thought, although the confusion was quickly brushed away when Alice gestured to the table once more. She blinked, only then realizing the generous lunch before them. "You really didn't have to – " she said, only to be silenced by Alice.

"It's the least I can offer you, Bella," she said, gesturing for Bella and her brother to take a seat. "Please, you two; take a seat. I'm starving."

**x~x~x**

"I'm not even sure what the hell I'm doing now," Edward was saying, looking thoroughly disgusted as he explicated to Alice and Bella. "This is insanity, and I would never do this if I had another choice."

Bella quietly peered up from her lunch, unsure whether she should offer her thoughts or not. Edward was currently discussing his predicament about the whole girlfriend introduction thing, and she almost pitied him – the poor bastard certainly looked more than desperate. She wondered if his fangirls even had an idea what they put him through every single day, and decided that they probably didn't.

"I really don't want to do this," Edward muttered with a slight shake of his head.

As if to openly contradict him, it was then that the bell rang, signaling the official beginning of lunchtime. It didn't take long for the students to arrive, and the lunchroom was crowded in no time at all. At the same time, the fangirls that Edward had been avoiding the entire day were beginning to crowd around their table, as if telling him that nope, there was no escaping this little announcement whatever that they had going on.

_Shit, _ Bella thought, growing anxious by the second. She was starting to hyperventilate, even while knowing that all those people were looking at Edward and not her. What if they asked why she was with him and Alice? Oh _no no no _– that would not sit well with her at all. The last thing that she wanted was unnecessary attention to herself.

"I – I think we need to hurry up and get this over with," she meekly said, prompting both Alice and Edward to look at her. She watched the two of them nod, and she sighed, practically just shoving the food into her mouth and swallowing them without chewing.

Unfortunately for her, the fangirls were not the most patient individuals in the world. Before she could realize it, one of them had already approached Edward, smiling a smile that seemed too friendly for comfort.

It was Freya Svenningsen, appearing so much more gorgeous up close that even Bella had to blink. The clumsy young woman couldn't even begin to start comprehending why someone so beautiful like Freya would act so _desperate. _It was rather pathetic doing things like this, and Bella almost, _almost _ pitied her.

"So, Edward," Freya greeted, her voice saccharine as she clapped her hands together, effectively silencing the lunchroom with that simple gesture. Around them, the world seemed to stop, everyone watching the exchange anxiously. "I think you know why we're all here this particular afternoon."

Edward put down his utensils and rose from his seat, acknowledging Freya with a nod. "Of course. I remember what I said yesterday very clearly."

Bella swallowed, taking a sip of her Coke as she switched her gaze from the young man to the young woman, and then to the young man again. It wasn't too late to back out just yet; Edward could still make this right and _not _ say anything instead. It wasn't as if he owed anyone an explanation; his life was a private matter that no one – not even fangirls – should intrude upon.

_Then again, that's just me, _Bella thought as soon as she heard the next words that Edward spoke.

"Before anything else," the young man started, "I want to make it clear that I truly didn't want to do this." He shoved a hand in his pocket. "The last thing I would want is for the entire school to meddle with something that I consider very personal to me."

"I am, however, aware that I gave my word yesterday." He took a pause. "Before I make my announcement, I want to let everyone know that I'm hoping that you respect the person I've been going out with, as well as our relationship."

There was a momentary silence, until the female population muttered quiet grumble of agreement. It wasn't as if that was good enough of a comfort, but seriously, it was the most that anyone could expect from them right now. Bella personally doubted if they could make a promise like that at this point, when the girlfriend that Edward was telling them about still had no name.

"All right, then," Edward said, giving an almost imperceptible sigh.

Bella chewed on her food slowly, watching the reaction of the girls as she would a thriller movie. It was pretty exciting, in a way, watching their expressions shift from anxiety to surprise to confusion to… wait, was it just her or was everyone looking at _her_?

Bella blinked, unsure if she was imagining things. She looked around the lunchroom, furrowing her eyebrows when she realized that almost everyone _was_ looking at her. Confusion making its way to her face, she glanced over to Edward who was, surprisingly, also looking at her.

Wait, _what_?

"Everyone, I'm proud to introduce to you," Edward said, his voice amplified by the absolute silence in the lunchroom. "My girlfriend, Bella Swan."

Did Edward Cullen really just say what he just said?

_to be continued._

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